Several weeks ago, I was invited to give my life testimony to a group of about one hundred people. The timing was perfect. On August 7th, 2023, I had released the epilogue to my book, entitled “Choose Life Now,” so it was the perfect opportunity to talk about the two 29 year halves in my life; the first half in which I lived for pleasing myself and the second half where I strove to please my Lord and Savior Jesus Christ on a day-to-day basis.
Most people who know me today have only known me only as a Christian and would probably describe me as a standup guy. At least I hope so! The people who knew me growing up, however, likely had a much different view. If asked, they would probably describe me as a classic narcissist. It wouldn’t be an understatement to say that I was completely self-absorbed and that my life revolved around me, myself, and I. Did I indulge in all sorts of hedonistic activities – yes. Was I looking out for myself at the expense of others – yes. You get the picture. Not to offend any Jersey natives out there, but I was a “Jersey Punk” from head to toe!
Looking back at this time from an analytical eye I can honestly say that I was “someone who lived for and loved worldly pleasure!’ Now, don’t get me wrong. Pleasure in and of itself is not a bad thing. In fact, it can be a great thing. But when it’s your sole focus in life to the dismissal and denial of everything else that is good, better, or best, then it’s a huge problem. And that’s where I found myself for the first 29 years of my life. Like King Solomon, I did not deny myself anything my eye desired. If I wanted to have it, try it or do it, I went for it, no matter the consequences. And yes, most of the time it resulted in negative consequences – isolation, loneliness, indebtedness, just to name a few.
It didn’t take me long to realize the connection between my pursuit of worldly pleasure and resulting disaster. Like I said, my life was filled with negative consequences. But what took me a little longer to figure out was the association between pleasure seeking and an attitude of self-sabotage. You see, those of us who seek only self-gratifying pleasure are also prone to baling out on experiences, relationships, and opportunities at the first signs of discomfort, pain, or responsibility. Even worse, we end up missing out on those things that will bring us some level of fulfillment and satisfaction. Sadly, that was me. In my early years, I quit on everything that was seemingly good in my life. I wanted to be a college football player then quit after arguing with my coach. I wanted to be a stockbroker, so applied and got the job, then quit when my boss ask that I perform. I wanted to become a haberdasher, so I applied and was hired by three clothing companies and then quit each one when things didn’t go my way. I wanted a girlfriend so I would ask a girl out, start dating, then quit the relationship at the first sign of conflict or difficultly. Then it dawned on me. What pleasure seekers do best is quit when the going gets tough and in the process are never content. I couldn’t bear this self-destructive cycle anymore. I needed a change.
On August 7th, 1994, the change would come when I accepted Jesus into my life. At that moment I would begin walking the path back home to the Garden, our original home where we were meant to live in peace, joy, and harmony. Not surprisingly, it was early in my journey that I would realize that the path ran counter to the one I was walking before. In fact, it led in the opposite direction. Where my prior path called for the use of mind-altering drugs, the path leading to the Garden called for purity of mind. Where one promoted sexual promiscuity, the other promoted self-control. Where one encouraged laziness and dependence, the other encouraged hard work and discipline. And where one cheered on quitting, the other cheered on perseverance. It is no exaggeration to say that the initial steps in the journey back home required a great exchange of heart and mind.
In speaking about the end days, Timothy makes an interesting observation about pleasure and its focus in our lives. He said that “people will be lovers of themselves, lovers of money, boastful, proud, abusive, disobedient to their parents, ungrateful, unholy, without love, unforgiving, slanderous, without self-control, brutal, not lovers of the good, treacherous, rash, conceited, (and then finishes with this) lovers of pleasure rather than lovers God.” As I said earlier, I have lived two opposite lives of equal length in my fifty-eight years on earth, but they had one thing in common, they were both lives characterized by pleasure seeking. The significant difference, however, has been the focus of my desire and gratification. You see, in my first 29 years the target in my sights was ‘self’. While in the second 29 years, the target has been God. So yes, I am still seeking pleasure in my life, but now the primary one is the pleasure that comes from knowing and loving God. Whereas before I would deify pleasure resulting in catastrophe, now I am deifying God from whom all blessings and pleasures flow.
I want to leave you with the same question I posed to my audience a few weeks ago when I gave my testimony, “What if loving God became our pleasure?” What would life look like if that were the case? For me, the answer is clear, but everyone needs to find out for themselves. My hope and prayer are that you choose life now and embrace the pleasure that comes from loving, and being loved, by the one and only God!
See you in the Garden,
Dario L. Perla