In our last blog we discussed the importance of being empathetic in our quest to love. We discovered that empathy is the ability to get involved in other people’s lives and to do so with vulnerability. In my personal journey I have discovered that one of the greatest hindrances to vulnerability is uncertainty. In other words, having doubt, skepticism, suspicion, and mistrust about someone or something. Uncertainty can extend to having a complete lack of conviction and in practicial terms can be debilitating to the pursuit of personal goals and happiness. So how do we transition from uncertainty to certainty? Glad you asked!
What I discovered on my personal quest to love was that when I was in a state of uncertainty my mind was ruled by apprehension, reservation, and second thoughts. These negative sentiments created a fog in my mind that paralyzed me and hindered my ability to decide or overthink a decision. This mental state is linked to the condition known as the “paralysis of analysis.” At its essence it is based in fear – whether the fear of making the wrong decision or the fear of missing out on the best outcome. Either way, this fear makes us feel stuck – hopeless and helpless to move forward!
Let me share a personal story that I hope conveys how uncertainty can rule one’s life. Years ago, when I was facing what I would call a major decision I found myself polling just about anyone for their opinions. The more the better was my theory. But the more people I polled, the more I was confused, and eventually mental paralysis set in. I was uncertain about what to do and this state of uncertainty began to take a toll on my well-being. So, I did the only thing that I thought would help and cried out to God. And here is what He said, “get rid of the distractions!’
Here’s my point. Seeking advice and wise counsel from others is not bad. In fact, it is often advisable and productive. But polling others (basically anybody) for their opinions will often distract us from truth and lead us astray. So, I began a process of exchanging opinions for wisdom by ridding my life of worldly distractions and seeking God’s truth through his Word and his people. And guess what, I started to make the crossing from the bridge of ‘uncertainty to certainty’ I found myself growing in peace as life decisions became clearer. You see, I was no longer concerned about directing the outcomes because my decisions were led and directed by wisdom. Uncertainty was dissipating and certainty was solidifying.
And as my certainty grew stronger and stronger, my journey home to the Garden became that much more within reach. That is what happens in your soul when you cross the bridge from “uncertainty to certainty.” Focus and clarity become the lens from which you view the world. It becomes so clear in fact that it becomes imbedded in your senses! So, I ask you, do you have certainty? Can you see, smell, feel, hear, and taste the garden?!!!
Dario L. Perla